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Tips for making parenting decisions after divorce

Divorce means that your marriage is over, but the obligations of being a parent don't change. You still need to work together to raise your child.

It can be hard. You and your spouse may not be thrilled to work together on anything since you're no longer romantically involved. You may have feelings of anger, sorrow or frustration left over from the split.

As parents, remember that you need to appear to be on the same page, at least to your kids. Don't have your fights in front of them. Work through it on your own so that you can back each other up when making decisions.

Sometimes, this can mean deferring to the other parent. One of you may care more about a specific decision -- such as how much freedom your child can have and at what age. You may never agree, but, to make sure you don't undermine one another's authority, you may have to support a position that you don't technically like. Pick your battles.

Remember that your kids are smart. Some children try to use the division between their parents against them.

After all, if you're fighting with one another about a certain decision -- when the kids have to do their homework, for instance -- that basically lets them off the hook. They know it. They might try to get you to fight or argue just to put off the decision. That's why an appearance of unity is so important and makes your lives so much easier in the long run.

Co-parenting after divorce may be tough, but it's possible. Be sure you are always well aware of your rights and obligations after the split.

Source: Empowering Parents, "When Parents Disagree: 10 Ways to Parent as a Team," Debbie Pincus, accessed Sep. 06, 2017

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